Friday, April 29, 2011


It's the calm before the storm of the royal wedding in the UK.  Tonight, our TV channels will be broadcasting little else.  There'll be detailed descriptions of Kate's dress, a blow-by-blow account of who was there, what they wore, what they said, what they did...and so on.  The wedding will cost the equivalent of NZ$41 million - that's nearly 20 million British pounds or 22 million Euros or 30 million Australian dollars or nearly US$33 million.

I personally think this is a waste of money.  Not just because it's royalty - I admit I'm not a huge fan on the monarchy - I think any culture that spends excessively on weddings is just plain crazy.

Yes, I know it may be "tradition".  But that doesn't make it worth keeping.  It used to be a tradition to keep slaves, or make enormous profits from tenant farmers, or treat some people as untouchable.  That doesn't make these things right or good. Spending that kind of money when the country is suffering from a recession is not right in my book.

But money aside, how do you feel about weddings?  Yes, I've been married, but it wasn't because I was dreaming of a white knight on a steed rescuing me so we could live happily ever after.  I had no such fanciful illusions.  I married for simply pragmatic reasons and my wedding was in a registry office with staff as witnesses.

Historically, marriage was for the protection of children and I believe this is still so.  I am not concerned about whether my children marry their partners.  This doesn't mean that I don't think people should respect the partners they choose to spend their lives with - I do.  I just don't think marriage is a requirement to do that.  What do you think?


  1. I don't believe marriage is a necessary requirement for a couple and sometimes it can change a relationship so that it falters (or maybe it would have faltered anyway). I agree with you that no relationship should be committed to lightly and constant awareness and respect of each others feelings should be the cornerstone. I have been married more than once and am working very hard at making this one work for life.

    Having had failures in marriage I wasn't keen to enter into that state again but I did find it difficult referring to my now husband as 'my partner'. Maybe it's a generational thing but saying 'my husband' now gives me a stronger sense of belonging, pride and warmth.

  2. Hmm, I had a quick bristle at the comments about the Royal Wedding, yes it cost a lot of money but it was a fantastic day and a glorious example of what England does well, the pagentry, the pomp and all that flag waving. I think that attracts a lot more money to the country than it costs and it is good to feel pride in the place you live. On weddings in general, I think it gives a certain security, it's a good move for a woman, financially, but it is no longer necessary - unless, like me you are a family historian, I dread to think how they will sort out our family trees in the future!!
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